Wednesday 28 April 2010

Pimp, Push, Pimp, Push and Coast!

Gotta love the hand-holding, dat's like proper African politics, lol!

I was browsing through The Guardian's stories on Ahmadinejad's recent visit to Zimbabwe - as expected the stories were filled with much contempt and disdain for Ahmadinejad and Mugabe. Why is that all levels of informed critique go out the window when less favourable figures of the West are written about? In one article the Grauniad (not it’s not a typo, that's what readers call it) reporter scoffs at the suggestion that Iran is an emerging power...yet at least every other day, a story is published about the (faux) nuclear threat Iran poses to the world and how the 'global powers' must 'stop them'. So is Iran an emerging power or not?  Why the reluctance to admit it?

On Mugabe and Tsvangirai's different attitudes to Ahmadinejad's visit is seen by MDC-T as signifying that the ‘half-horse, half-donkey government’ is not working according to Nelson Chamisa (MDC, Min. of Information). But why this seemingly media-opportunistic negativity by MDC-T, did Prime Minister Tsvangirai not know Ahmadinejad was coming? I did. I read about it online in a Zim tabloid story about the Zimbabwean state visit to Iran led by Didymus Mutasa in March this year. So why the silliness Tsvangson?


The Gruaniad reports: "[Tsvangirai's] party, the Movement for Democratic Change, described the trip as "a colossal political scandal" and said that inviting Ahmadinejad to an investment forum is "like inviting a mosquito to cure malaria". " The full statement was thus: "Choice of friends defines character and inviting the Iranian strongman to an investment forum is like inviting a mosquito to cure malaria. Hobnobbing with dubious political leaders confirms stereotypes that we are a banana republic."


A scandal among whom; Africa or the West? Is the AU or SADC bovvered? Hello, hello...Is anyone there out there, anyone at all raising strong objections? *SMH* The MDC-T preached passionately about the rogue, ChinaInAfrica, but today who's offering Angola and Zambia low-interest loans? Notwithstanding the stories of Chinese exploitation of labour in the mines and flooding markets with cheap rejects, please put Deborah Brautigam's The Dragon's Gift: The Real Story of China in Africa on your Christmas wishlist, dear Tsvangson.


And while I'm ranting, let's remember Mr Prime Minister, that you yourself have also been 'hobnobbing' with 'dubious politicians' - how quick you forget what happened when you took your begging bowl to our Kenyan brother in the White House, then jet-hopped to the regional governor of Harare North at 10 Downing St then onto sweet Paris where Sarkozy's cheese and wine flowed, only to be quickly sobered up with the words: 'no cash shall flow till the 'rule of law' is restored.' Soon after that came the IMF's high-interest $500 million loan that came with a fifth shaved off to pay previous arrears.


Albeit differently, the carrot on the stick tactics of this group are also dubious: using political clout to make a point while making ordinary people suffer for it (e.g. visa restrictions, loan re-payments, deportations of Black asylum seekers, multinational corps jumping ship), is arguably more dubious and materially damaging than the promises of oil from Libya and Equatorial Guinea, for example. Eq. Guinea's promises were really just promises that failed to materialize and the deal with Libya fell through because Gadaffi was trying to hustle Mugabe and pay a ridiculously low price for NOCZIM shares. With other Midde East oil suppliers Mugabe had verbal clout, but couldn't throw down $, because the country was broker than a $2 hustler scrimping for change - thanks to corruption by Mug n Thugs Inc. and the kooky economics of zero-slashing and endless money printing of Reserve Bank Governor Gideon Gono.


The bottom line is everybody who's somebody in global politics is a pimp or a pusher the rest are junkies hooked on aid or slaves in debt. Either, you become a playa on your own terms and protect your interests or you will get played - that's the cold trooof! I don't believe selective Western benevolence will help Zimbabwe and time will tell if Middle Eastern alliances are strategically a good thing for us, BUT this must be in recognition of this single truth:
Zimbabwe needs to be fixed up by honest Zimbabweans in order to enter the pimp and push game as a playa, not some crack addict perpetually begging for a few more hits on cred.

One last thing, why are these young girls wearing hijabs and the men in the background wearing taqiyahs? If early childhood memory serves me right, when Pope John Paul II came and errrybody turned Catholic overnite and today we are all Muslim???

pics by Desmond Kwande AP/Getty Images

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

wena ke! uzatshayiwa. lol!
ST

KonWomyn said...

LOL! By who tshomi? I'm just telling it like it is, truth hurts.

Jay said...

Sure thing Sis, I'm with down with the hiphop! Tsvangirai is a puppet if you ask me, Mugabe may be alot of things, but I support him for refusing to bow to the West.

This is when the issue of sovereignty becomes important. What Iran and Zimbabwe get up to is not the business of the West. They are a bunch of hypocrites, they talk about Iran visiting Zimbabwe like it was the worst thing yet daily they are bombing Afghanis and Iraqis are suffering the aftermath of an illegal war. They are wrong!

Who are they to question Zimbabwe-Iran relations yet they turned their backs when Tsvangirai went begging?

You should see the CiF piece by Miles Tendi, its also excellent!

Jay said...

I meant Ahmadinejad not Iran visiting Zimbabwe.

KonWomyn said...

Bluuud

Faya always bruv! Yea I hear ya, co-sign, co-sign. But you know what got me to write in this way? The pics of those young sistas wearing the hijab.

Much love for Muslims, but I find it disturbing that Zimbos are now taking to wearing the cultural attire not of their own bec we want something from somebody. In an alternate hyper-sensitive universe that would be called jigging.

When are we going to get our act together and build on what we have? China comes, we give. Iran comes, we give. In Tsvangson's Zimbabwe, Britain comes back again, we give again. When are going to meet Ahmadinejad or whoever as equal playas in this game?

Always the hustled, never the hustler.

And while iLove that this friendship pisses off the West to no end - my people, we need to rise up!